The pain of Loss

Please excuse me if I jump around here.
I don't even know where to begin.
On the 29th of July 2015 my dad lost his battle with cancer. Thankfully, he passed away peacefully in his sleep with my Mum and sister with him. It was Mum's birthday the next day. I was due to arrive two days later. I was too late.
I've never lost anyone close to me. Never felt the awful pain that I did, and still do. Never felt so disconnected with everything like I do. Never sat back and re-evaluated my life up to this point in time. Things I have felt, thought about, seen.
Just going through the motions of trying to appear normal. It's when I am alone, times like now, that it hits me all over again. He is gone. I will never hear his voice again. Never see his smile, never receive one of his massive warm hugs. Never sit with him in comfortable silence, with no need for any words.
My pain is for myself, my brother and sisters, but it is also for my Mum. The heartbreak of loosing the person you loved and lived with for nearly 50 years. I can't even imagine. It would be like loosing a part of yourself. My parents were in love since the day they met and never spent any long periods of time apart from one another.
Us four kids are not really into being the centre of attention. But we all spoke at Dad's funeral. My younger sister did the eulogy. I recited a poem I wrote (the day before). My older sister spoke about her time with dad and so did my brother. My brother in particular astonished me. He is a man of very few words, but he captivated everyone with his heartfelt speech.
I know people say that the pain gets less over the years. Maybe it will. But for now, it hurts like hell.

I miss you, Daddy.

Catch-up

Hey everyone.

Well I have good news and not so good news..
The not so good news first.

Hubby had his annual Heart check-up and the results were not good. Basically, without boring you with details, his heart is not doing so well.. we are looking at transplant. He is supposed to be taking it easy..not so simple with the business. Anyway, he took it pretty hard. Freaked him out a bit. And I am freaking out a little as well. But then it wasn't like it was unexpected. Still... it's not nice to have to face reality when you're not ready for it.

My Dad is doing ok. After he and Mum have finally moved into a house they are both a lot happier. And my little sister is living there to now. Not with them, in a place of her own. She is so cute. She was all excited on the phone to me about how she has to budget her money now. LOL.. Welcome to the adult world little sis.

Business is doing pretty good. My little coffee bar is slowly gaining it's regulars. We have customer loyalty cards now. Every 5th cup free. Yes I am that generous.. haha.

I was able to build myself a kick-ass gaming pc and I have re-discovered Skyrim...with MODS! Never thought I'd be a PC gamer, but I am hooked. Oh I still use a controller, so I haven't completely conformed.

Been getting into my art again. When I have time to do it that is. Just a canvas, a tag and a little mixed media book. I will post pics when I can..

I've been thinking of creating a new blog page dedicated to my art work. I have my name registered now, under our corporation, so I need to start promoting. What do you guys think of another blog here on Blogger? It means I will be around here more as well..

Ramblings and some news

So first off, my son celebrated his 14th birthday a couple of weeks ago. He had two friends for a sleepover and LAN party. For those not in the know (or should I say for those of you who aren't giant geeks) a LAN party is when you bring all your computers to one location and connect them all via cable and game together. Well this was Hubby's element so the boys were in good hands. We also took them out for authentic Italian pizza and a gorgeous rich chocolate cake that I made. 

We are now officially the coolest parents. Ever. Oh and I LOVE his friends because they thought I was in my twenties... hehehe.. Hubby is mortified..the poor dear. :) (which reminds me, I will have to blog about my 40th. It was super special)

Now....
I FINALLY GOT THE CAR I WANTED!!! Yes.. I have a Subaru Forester. It's all silver and we got the windows re-tinted and I LOVE her! yes...it is a she, and her name is YUKI (pronounced yooki). It's Japanese meaning is happiness and good fortune. She's so pretty. We got a really good price for her and the previous owner had it serviced all the time. 

In other news.. Months ago we started seriously looking for a business to buy. Well we had one lined up. It was the sister company of the business Hubby was working at. An IT business that caters to the retail side, while the other company does business. To cut a long story short, the owner decided he didn't want to sell it, but now he has changed his mind again and we are now in a position to buy it. We are getting it for a really good price and at the moment it is very profitable, but with the things in mind we have for it, it could prove to be an extremely good investment. We are going to turn it into a kind a internet cafe place where people can come in, get their computers, phones, laptops fixed. Also we sell new, and we are going to offer How-to classes. As well as serving one hell of a good coffee. Did I tell you I am a qualified Barista now? I can't remember, anyway, I am and we are going to put a coffee machine in there. 

I can't really think of much else. Our plans for christmas have gone a little awry... Hubby may have to miss a day or two at the holiday house we have booked near my folks, because of the shop..but oh well.  

Oh.. I told you that Moby was living outside now (not in the shed at night) an while he has been very good, he did get in a fight the other night. Naughty kitty. He got a good smack in the face to. Not by me.. from the other cat. Anyway he is now sporting a badass cut on the side of his face. Don't worry, it's not bad and he is fine. He got a severe talking to from me though. Fighting at his age... 

Look what my local supermarket had!!! I nearly fell over myself when I saw them.. I have been wanting to try authentic S'mores for so long! Toasted them Aussie-style...over the BBQ.. heh. And yeah, they were worth it for the devineness that was them (and also because now I know how to make them with aussie products). We don't have Graham crackers here, but I will find something similar. The only thing I didn't like about this kit was the chocolate they provided wasn't quite right. Not thin enough and the squares weren't right. But I will do my own research and make Aussie S'mores if it's the last thing I do on this good earth!!! 


That's it for now. :)

Daily Planner.

So I haven't really had much time to be overly crafty lately. One project I am working on, however is a 2015 daily planner. I have spent a lot of time searching the Internet for the best way to set out my planner. What would be best to suit my needs and the closest one I found was the Erin Condrin Life Planner. Now I could have just ordered one of them (if I had a spare $50 - $70)..or I could do what I always do and just DIY it. 

I set out the planner to have the week spread out over two pages, laying flat. Each day is in columns and broken into three sections: Morning, Afternoon and Evening. I have a section for a WEEKLY TO DO list and Saturday and Sunday are halved into the one column.. to give me a bit more width for weekdays. I printed out these pages on nice Strathmore cream drawing paper and bound the seven signatures (Groups of four pages) with dental floss. (dental floss for the waxed coating and it wont break. I bound all seven signatures together and then covered the loose book with a nice thick patterned card stock. 

As for the cover I have gone for a hand made leather slip cover. I decided to make it a slip cover in case I wanted to make the same planner for the year after. It's a simple design. One long piece of leather, slightly higher than the book and then folded over and sewn to form the slip bits the book is held into place by.  

I haven't done the cover yet, but I am quite pleased how the actual planner has turned out. It's very sturdy and firm, meaning I bound it well. My book binding has gotten a lot better since I last tried it. Yes I will post pics when it is all done. 

Oh.. one thing I did work on a few months ago was this drawing. It's done with different black ink pens on the Strathmore Drawing paper... 

It's pretty detailed and took me quite a few days to do. That colour is not true.. it's actually on cream paper. 

And this is Moby unsuccessfully trying to be a sausage roll.

Sue the Subaru

I'm writing this while listening to my Husband and son bash away at a piece of our car. To clarify it's a car we bought from the wreckers and are trying to get it back to road worthy. It's not a bad little car. A Subaru Outback. When we bought it, it had a smoking engine and bald tires, rusty muffler and the driver's side guard has a sizable dent in it....which is what they are bashing at now..in the back yard. 

It was destined for the scrap yard. To be honest I have every confidence in my husband to getting this car back into shape, even the dent. He has done up a lot of cars in the past. So this one was no different. The engine was completely torn down and put back together. ....

So I just had to go outside and inspect their panel beating. They have done a pretty good job. This car project serves a duel purpose. Hubby is using it as a bonding experience with the son. They have had a few issues since son has hit that terrible teenage milestone and they both need to work on their relationship. They have good days and bad. Mostly when hubby gets frustrated a job takes twice as long to do and son storms off in a huff. Or son had plans to sit on his electronics and doesn't want to be under the bonnet of a car... It's a slow process but they are trying.

Another good thing that has come out of this is that Hubby now knows a Subaru engine back to front and is finally going to get me the one I actually wanted.. the 4x4 Forester. YAY!