Dec 1, 2011

M**er F**er, the Christmas Tree.

Some years, I try to get into the Christmas mood.  I put on some carols and haul out my tree and decorations and have at it while belting out carols with gusto.

Sometimes though.... 
I fight with the tree who I have affectionately named M**er F**er, receiving a number of scrapes and booboos thanks to its wiry, slasher-like sticky out limbs and general un-cooperativeness. I always come out of it looking like I climbed into a bag full of angry cats. That’s also when I put on my “angry” music. Something like Offspring or Limp Bizkit...

Today is the first day of December and while Hubby isn’t interested in festive decorating, he IS a stickler for so-called rules and insists that the tree be put up. Today. So I am off, down to the garage to collect said evil MF tree and decoration box.

One thing I can say is that no Christmas for the past six years has ever been the same. Given that I have been living in a new home each time. I have loved the challenge of figuring out where the MF tree will go, and the lights and other christmasy things I like to put out. This year we are a little short on room, but our dining/lounge room opens out onto our balcony with huge glass doors, so I am thinking of putting the tree right at the front, and given that we are high up, the whole neighbourhood will be able to see our tree in all its sparkling, multicoloured twinkling glory. 
MF last year..


  1. Thanks Sprite. I love Christmas but I hate decorations. My wife has TWO trees and now I have a secret name for both of them.

  2. Okay, I read up until the name of the tree and started laughing...had to say that...will go back and read the rest now.

  3. Still laughing. This brought laugh tears to my eyes. Have to say, MF is a beautiful tree! Can't wait to see pics of him this year. :)

  4. I enjoyed hearing about your love/hate relationship with your X-mas tree. Our tree is in the garage under a tarp, on a platform with casters. At the appropriate time I'll roll it into position. And a week after X-mas I'll push it back to the garage.

  5. I would love a fake tree but my hubby always wants a really strong scented one. So I am very happy to be going away....not tree, no decorations, no mess to clean up afterwards. I'm doing a little jig with a huge happy smile across my face just thinking of it!!!!

  6. @Dbs My pleasure :) TWO trees? is she a sucker for punishment or what?
    @Frisky glad it made you laugh..:) Oh there will be pics
    @Stephen OMG that's funny.. and convenient :)
    @Carole.. LOL! Good for you!

  7. Humbug!

    In a few days the wife is gonna say "Let's get the tree and decorations out and put 'em up".

    "OK!" I will answer full of enthusiasm before returning to the football on TV.

    Eventually, on or around the 13th (Up 12 days before, down 12 days after), our Christmas stuff will go up ... if we remember.

    I started to despise Christmas when I reached an age whereby I became no longer eligible to receive interesting and useful gifts after having been unceremoniously dump into that recipient-group known as the 'old fogey' brigade. We, apparently, are only permitted to receive socks, deodorant and, more often than not, the bill.

    This is not my favourite time of year!

  8. I did not realize that today was Christmas Tree day!

  9. @Symdaddy.. aww you poor thing.. hug
    @Laoch apparently it is.. according to Hubby it has to go down before the new year to. No idea where he got these rules

  10. Oh, it's been many, many years since I've put up a Christmas tree. My family only used the fake variety, so I know full well the horrors of wrestling one out of its box--OUCH! Cine living on my own now these past 11 years, I've yet to put up a tree in our house. While I love the holiday season to death, I'm afraid the tree part of the equation utterly defeats me.

    So, my hat's off to you, Sprite. You're a better reveler than I am! :)

    Oh, and P.S.: If I were to put up a tree, I would have waited until this weekend to do it. I believe in similar rulers like your husband . . . but within reason.

  11. Our kids are old enough now that they pretty much do the work for us. Makes things a lot easier!

  12. i love that you call it mother fucker. i will now refer to any future trees of mine by that name in my head. and when my family members see me smiling at the tree, they'll never guess why.

  13. I also love that you call the tree "MF", hilarious...I think the balcony sounds like a grand idea!

  14. @David Hubby refused to listen to the carols, but I put them on when he
    @Leslie..LOL! I did it all on my own... poor Hubby and son know that I am too fussy when it comes to the tree decorating..I know I'm terrible! LOL!
    @Sherilin Hehee...
    @Caren lol! OH! NOT ON the balcony..WOO! (we are having extremely windy weather at the moment. Now I am laughing, picturing MF being blown down the street, terrorising the neighbourhood, scraping on windows, picking up small dogs and children as it goes.....) no it is safely behind the glass door.

  15. We were just talking about this very thing at work today. Remember those halcyon (I love that word!) days when the very thought of Christmas threw us into paroxysms of joy? It seemed to take FOR freakin' EVER to get here.
    Flash forward a few (okay...several in my case) decades.
    The adults we've become greet Christmas as a chore (I too have an MF tree and decorations boxes).
    Children: Will Christmas ever come???
    Adults: It's frikkin' !%$#(&@%! Christmas already!? Ohhhhh....F!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  16. Oh my god, I had the same tree, finally got rid of it and now have a lovely small cooperative one. My tree is up and that is all the decorating I do.

  17. @Al..LOL! I hear ya!
    @Mynx I haven't put up any extra lights this year. Couldn't be bothered.

  18. Yes, I'd definitely go for a window. It makes the entire place look festive!


  19. @K9friend that's where he is.. pics to come.

  20. Our tree never seems to go in the same place, probably because my Dad likes to change the arrangement of the lounge room at least once a year. We're using a plastic tree for the first time this year - and I had to assemble and decorate two of them at the Studio A season finale, haha! So I'm in a lot of practice this year.

  21. @Ruth, there was really only one place to put our tree. I've never had a real tree myself.. couldn't bear the thought of hacking down a poor tree just for!

  22. LOL!

    I'm so using that. Copyrighted to you of course.

    Mofo2 ?

  23. @Ant you are most welcome to! I'm sure I'm not the only one to have an evil tree.


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