Ladyscaping. Plus a nude cartoon of me.

Ladies, hands up if you agree with me.

Ladyscaping just ain’t what it used to be.

Am I right? 

Now that I am getting.. ahem..older and a little more..EHEM..rounder in the middle, I have found tending the ladygarden to be increasingly frustrating. So much so that I have contemplated going all hippy and letting it grow, free to its heart’s content.

Gone are the days of the humble pink daisy disposable razor. Us ladies are provided with more than a few options these days. Now when you are shopping for your next pruning tool you are bombarded with a plethora of choices.

Single blade, two blades, triple blade, four blades, five blades, moisture strip, moisture block, vibrating head, detachable heads, replaceable heads, two heads (no I made that one up).  All designed to make the experience much more pleasurable by revealing your “inner goddess” and “Freeing your skin”.
 Free my skin?
 I didn't know my skin needed liberating.  


Do I now need to go make up some placards?

Then there are the electric razors. They either cut or pull your hair. Call me crazy but what girl in her right mind would trust her girl parts to a small machine that either rips your hair out, or has dozens of samurai like blades whizzing round at a gazillion miles per hour, foil protection sheet or no. Not me.

Let me say this. None of these fancy razors make any difference when you have let yourself go slightly. It makes for a longer than normal shower time.

Moving on from the razors, the next step in feminine maintenance is the various crèmes, gels, mousses and sprays that are supposed to make all of your hair magically give up their hold on you and fall out of their follicles. This method is slightly more convenient than shaving, as you don’t have to contort yourself into a pretzel shape to reach the offending areas. You just point and shoot. So to speak. Only drawback is, is that you DO have to allot about ten to twenty minutes of your time where you will have to stand in the bathroom, naked from the waist down, legs spread, with mousse clinging to your nether regions. It’s a perfect time to catch up on a little reading, meditation, internet surfing, bill paying, phoning your mother in law...

At the end of the prescribed time you then scrape, rinse, buff, shine or scrub off the stuff to hopefully reveal super silky smooth skin underneath. It’s not a bad way to go. But don’t, DON’T under any circumstances do this mere minutes before a hot date. Pain hurty burny Bad...

Which brings me to the last method I will talk about today. Les Wax. I am sure most of you ladies have tried waxing at least one time in your lives. I did. ONCE. And that was only because I found a free sample strip in a magazine one time. I won’t go into detail but I can honestly say that I would rather hike to Mordor and fling myself into the fiery chasm of Mount Doom than ever do that again. EVER.. Having been unsuccessful in the removal of hair with the first strip, I tried it again in another area. Again people!.. I think I died a little inside. And the worse part of it was, I did not remove a single hair. Not one. 
And now here is my nude pic. Thats about as racy as I will get on here, so, appreciate away...

Drawing inspired by Vinny C. How did I do Vinny?

Needless to say I will not sympathise with any male when he complains about having to shave his face, once or twice a week. You’ve got nothing on what us girls have to go through. 


Na....thing.